Manipulation is more dangerous than normally people think, in fact many of us don’t see it coming until it has already hit and done the damage. It is so common in our daily life than one would normally guess, from being done with innocence out of love to being done with the sole purpose of exploitation for own benefit, its everywhere.
As its important to understand people so you don’t be heart broken often, its even more important to understand Manipulation so you are not taken for a ride. If you know when you’re being manipulated, you can safeguard yourself, if you know how someone manipulates then you can prevent before damage is done.
Sadly, emotional abuse is not uncommon. A 2013 study did found emotional abuse may be equally as harmful as physical abuse, both do contribute to low self-esteem and depression. A 2011 CDC survey also found out that 47.1% of women while 46.5% of men have experienced psychological aggression in a relationship.
Who has higher risk of being Manipulated ?
People with less clarity about things in life and own goals, people with lot of empathies and trust towards other – are easy targets, or say easy to be manipulated.
Below is a comprehensive list who gives an idea of characteristics that put us on more risk of being manipulated.
7 Top factors that leave you open for Manipulation
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More TrustfulPeople who normally trust others more than doubt, are more vulnerable to be misguided and manipulated.
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Blind Faith on the name of RelationMost often, People trust on the name of relation (like parents, child, brother, sister, friend, aunt, uncle etc) rather than seeing what actually people are. That leaves them vulnerable and open to be often deceived, because people are what they are !
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Less Assertive PeoplePeople who are less assertive are more open to be convinced, even against their will.
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NarcissistsThose who believe or want to believe they’re special, destined for greatness. They’re more likely to believe impossibly good things can -and should- happen to them.
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Low ConfidentThose with low confidence are more likely to hear others and follow their without putting much thought into it.
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Over confident OnesJust like low-confident, even the over confident ones are more likely to be manipulated. It might look bizarre, but over confidence makes them to take risk, to not worry of consequences and trust others more.
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Having weak SpotWhen a manipulator finds a weak spot, that can be any past incident or it can be social empowerment by relation like spouse or parents, or could be any fear or helplessness – that gives manipulator a chance to exploit the target.
What are main methods used by Manipulators
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GaslightingThey will shift blame on you, even if its their mistake. And by putting you on guilt, they would try to make them follow you, as you are right and since you have already done a fault so you follow them to rectify the mistake under guilt.
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Talk of past Emotion and not LogicThe most important sign of manipulator is that they never talk about – what’s right and right. Only an honest person can talk to right & wrong, explain it to you and empower you to see them. A manipulator instead would talk about what he has done for you in past, so you do for them without thinking.
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Drawing convenient examples, not right onesA manipulator would conveniently draw the examples that suits them. Normally you would find all kinds of examples in world, whether good or bad and right or wrong, b’coz world has all types of people. Like, manipulator might say – “This is what people do around us” – implying you do what he says without any logic, while manipulator himself would study & teach about good things and he may earn teaching or following different things but he will shows you the things that make you follow him/her.
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Using Social PressureA manipulator will try to put the target in front of people who are closer to the manipulator than target, and then put the facts in twisted manner, so as the target gets under pressure and has to agree to whatever the manipulator say.
How to safeguard Yourself
First you need to understand if there is any manipulation going on, and once you know then its time to safeguard yourself.
1st step – you should try to see what is right and wrong, based on whatever Principle you follow. If in doubt, take help of a neutral guide.
2nd Step – Be clear and confident. If you cannot, then find a guide who is neutral, a mentor who can give you unbiased ideas.
3rd step – Once you are sure, then next step is to make it clear to the manipulator. Clarify that you know its manipulation that he/she is trying with you and that you know what is truth, and so he/she shouldn’t try it with you anymore.
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